January 12th, 2023: Snowplow Parenting
I learned a few new parenting terms today from reading sports headlines of all things: Snowplow Parenting and Jellyfish Parenting.
Snowplow parenting: A parenting style that seeks to remove all obstacles from a child's path so they don't experience pain, failure, or discomfort.
Jellyfish parenting: Places few rules or demands on kids and parents seldom follow through on consequences when children do not follow the rules. This parenting approach often results in children who rank low in happiness and self-regulation.
The sports world is still trying to figure out the Berhalter-Reyna snowplow parenting drama and ESPN had a great read on it today: Berhalter-Reyna explained: Drama owes to overbearing parents.
Gregg Berhalter's decision to minimize the playing time of Gio Reyna at the 2022 World Cup has created an unrelenting drama for U.S. Soccer. Brad Smith/ISI Photos/Getty Images
It is definitely a growing cultural trend here in America as youth sports, higher education and the pursuit of success at all costs has become an idol. This quote summed it up well: "It is very hard to get Americans to accept suppressing, even temporarily, their individual desires in favor of group goals and endeavors," said Doug Lemov, who is the author of "Teach Like a Champion".
I hear ya Doug. I am grateful I wasn't a coach's kid but rather a son to over-timers, a truck driver and schoolteacher who let family friends, an older brother, coaches, grandparents, pastors, babysitters, summer camps, parents and teachers help raise me. It made me a team player and I give my imperfect everything into the teams I am a part of, so this mentality has always thrown me off but has non-intentionally benefited me as I work in a relationship and favor driven business. It has also protected me in the "what's in it for me" industry with ladder climbers, liars, thieves, slanderers, gossipers and snakes at every turn, which I can tell you doesn't stop at sports.
For me personally, as the dad to three amazing daughters, I can't wait to put them to work in our family business if they want to. Teach them the art of hard in-person work, help us win and let them fail and see me fail while also participating in the wisdom that comes from up and downs along the way. Plus, as they say, "Idle hands are the devil's workshop."
Snowplow Parenting: What It Is and How It Affects Kids (parents.com)
How Parents Are Robbing Their Children of Adulthood - The New York Times (nytimes.com)